


Lamenting to the Moon

by Mina Lightstar (ukefied)



Series: Breaking the Ice [3]
Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-20
Updated: 2014-01-20
Packaged: 2018-01-09 08:34:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1143843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ukefied/pseuds/Mina%20Lightstar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tenderness, goodbyes, and reassurances.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lamenting to the Moon

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written/posted 2004.

Leorio's bottom was beyond numb, but that was to be expected. After all, he had spent the majority of the last two-hour stretch sitting on the floor beside Kurapika's futon. More than once he'd thought of leaving for a short walk to exercise his legs, but knew that the moment he left, Kurapika would choose to wake up.

The blonde's previous awakenings hadn't given them any time alone. Since he'd regained consciousness, he had drifted in and out of sleep for the remainder of the day. Senritsu, much like Leorio, had resolved to remain by his bedside as long as she could. Eventually she *had* left, but only to make a call to their employer on Kurapika's cell phone. Kurapika had roused moments after her return, and she'd relayed that they would be leaving later the following day.

Leorio had tried not to let his disappointment show too badly. He'd known that their reunion would be short-lived, as they all still had much to do. Still though, he hadn't expected things to play out the way they had -- and he was certain Kurapika hadn't, either. They weren't able to spend much time alone together at all.

Kurapika, for his part, had accepted the news and was sure he would be ready for travel by then. Senritsu had left them soon thereafter, claiming that it was best if she returned to the Nostrad party. She would claim that Kurapika had fallen ill and was still with friends, but would be back in time for them to depart.

_"I'll walk with you tomorrow, to say goodbye,"_  Leorio had said, his head turned so he could watch the Music Hunter depart.

Senritsu had nodded, smiled, and replied,  _"I would like that. And so would he."_  Without another word, she had left the room, the door closing softly behind her.

She had never said anything aloud, but she was a clever woman. Given her natural insight -- coupled with her abilities -- Leorio had no doubts. She knew.

"Do you know that she knows?" Leorio mused, staring at Kurapika's peaceful face. He'd moved again and was now lying on his side, mouth parted just so, faint traces of pleased sighs leaving him with each exhalation. The Kuruta was curled up in such a way that he might have been slumbering through any other night, not sleeping off a Nen-induced fever that had left him bedridden for two days.

"Two days," he echoed aloud. Suddenly feeling fidgety, Leorio started worming his hands into his pockets so he wouldn't start dry-washing them. "Two more days where all I could do was hope you wouldn't get worse." Fear that the Genei Ryodan was searching for Kurapika had compelled Leorio and the others to keep their blond friend out of any public hospitals. Instead, they had chosen the abandoned building as their hideaway, Leorio and Senritsu doing what they could to see that he wouldn't get any worse, while Gon and Killua continued with their own plans concerning Greed Island.

Now it was over -- for the most part, it was over. Kurapika had not yet fully recovered; he still needed a night or two of real bed-rest, but he was getting there.

But *this* was also over: their reunion. They would part ways yet again, and so little time had been spent together. With a heavy sigh, Leorio dropped his face into his hands and rubbed his eyes. He was tired of many things, but most of all, he was tired of being so damn understanding.

"Hey," came a familiar whisper, "I should be looking that unwell, not you."

Leorio looked up and, upon seeing Kurapika's gentle smile, had to smile back. "Yo."

He was resting on one elbow, eyeing Leorio with both concern and curiosity. "Is something wrong?"

Leorio's smiling face transformed quickly into a flat stare. "Don't act like you don't know."

Kurapika blinked, once, and then averted his eyes. "Oh."

"Yeah. Oh." Leorio sighed again, hunching over so he could rest his chin on his hands.

"Things have gotten -- complicated," Kurapika said. He still wasn't looking Leorio's way, and some hesitance could be seen about him.

"If you mean we've screwed up our friendship because we--"

"No, I meant complicated in the sense that we'll be spending an awful lot of time apart."

Leorio said nothing. Kurapika was only repeating something they both knew very well, so it didn't need a reply.

"And I thought," the Kuruta went on, "that we were... okay with that."

Now Leorio blinked, straightening slowly so he could raise an eyebrow at his friend -- now his lover. "You mean, when we spoke at the café, the day we met after that robbery." It seemed like so long ago, after all that had happened.

"Mm." Kurapika shifted to lie down again, putting his arms behind his head and staring up at the bare ceiling. "So much has happened since then--"

"You can say that again."

"--but I'd thought, I'd *hoped*, it would still apply."

"Waiting, you mean. If we would wait for each other." There was no question about whether or not Leorio would wait. He wanted Kurapika and no other; he didn't think anyone, ever, could make him feel what the Kuruta did.

"I'd wait for you, since there's reason for it." Kurapika's voice had hardened a fraction, just enough so that Leorio could tell he was serious. "I've never had many close friends, Leorio, and the bonds I *do* make are unbreakable. Don't ever forget that."

"And I value my friends -- the true friends, who really matter -- over anything else. I think it's safe to assume that we're each aware to what length we'd go for bonds of friendship, and I think we both know that this isn't about our feelings, and it's not about whether or not we're willing to wait. Not really."

The tiny light bulb in the small room chose that moment to flicker and die, plunging them into darkness. After a moment, Leorio's eyes adjusted to the faint light that was coming from the moon. The window in this room was small and hardly worth mentioning, but it still allowed some moonlight to make the chamber glow.

A long minute passed before Kurapika ventured, "What, then, is it about? For you, I mean."

He thought it would have come easily, seeing as how they had shared so much during the last several days. They had admitted their mutual physical -- and emotional -- attraction, had made promises of a future for "them," and had later consummated, to use Kurapika's term for it, their blossoming relationship. It was almost laughable that saying what you felt could be harder than learning to make love, but here he was, struggling for the right words and flushing as he spoke them, leaning over Kurapika's prone form so they could be face-to-face.

"It's... just that we made all those promises, and then I thought it was over. At the hotel, when we, you know, I thought it was over. Or at least, a large part of it. I knew that we still had a ways to go, but the farther along we go -- the more I fall in love with you--" there, he'd said it, "the more I realize that I can't -- that I won't be able to -- can I kiss you?"

Kurapika, who had been keeping patient eyes on Leorio's face, looked bemused by the end. "You're such a... come here." Then he was reaching up, taking hold of Leorio's tie and using it to pull him closer.

When they parted, breathless from kissing, Leorio rested his forehead against Kurapika's. "So, I take it you're okay with that?"

"With what?" Kurapika breathed, releasing the tie. "You loving me? I knew it."

Somehow, that didn't surprise Leorio as much as he thought it should. "Ah. Well, do you? I mean, do you feel the same way?"

"What a question." Kurapika's voice was dry even through the tiredness. "What do you think I was trying to hide?"

Leorio laughed, breath puffing over Kurapika's lips. "So sometimes I'm a little slow."

"Sometimes?" Kurapika mused.

"Quiet, you." He moved away, looking up at the room's only source of light. "So. What a way for me to declare the depths of my affection."

"Trust me, it wasn't much of a revelation." Kurapika hesitated a moment, and then amended, "But all the same, it was nice to *hear* it. I mean, I knew, but that's not the same as hearing it."

"I'd make it so everyone could hear it, if you wanted," Leorio declared, and even as he said it, realized that he was serious. "We can tell the world," he added with a smirk, knowing it was an impossible -- and unnecessary -- task.

"We don't have to go that far," Kurapika chuckled. "But I don't mind. Whoever knows or doesn't know... it doesn't bother me."

Leorio shrugged one shoulder. Gon and Killua would find out eventually, so it didn't make a difference to him. "You know, sometimes when we start a conversation, we end up talking about everything but what we meant to discuss."

Kurapika yawned, barely managing to cover it with his hand, and then raised an eyebrow. "You mean reiterating the conversation we already had? Leorio, I know things change, and I know that much has happened, but I don't really think you're upset because we both have other things to do first."

"No," Leorio agreed, "I'm not." His own babbling had helped him come to that conclusion, as sounding off feelings to someone else often did. "I'm upset because--"

"Because we can't be together for long stretches of time. I know it." Kurapika shifted uncomfortably. "I did say that it wouldn't be fair for you wait--"

"No, no." Leorio waved the issue away. "Just forget everything I've whined about tonight. I wasn't thinking that clearly, because... well, like you said, so much has happened. We hardly got any time together. And we only had sex once," he added lightly, attempting to lighten the mood.

"Twice, technically," Kurapika corrected him with a smile.

"Yeah, well." Leorio shrugged, and then on impulse moved to crawl onto the futon. Kurapika moved over to make room for him under the blankets, little room though there was.

"Are you okay?" Kurapika asked him a minute later. "With this, still?"

"Just fine. It'll take some getting used to, I guess."

"I wish we had more time," the Kuruta confided. "I wish I didn't have to leave so soon."

"Me, too." Leorio bit the inside of his cheek, and then continued, "I wish this would be over and done with a lot quicker than it's been going. But I can wait. Even though I might have spells like this," he laughed.

"You're not the only one," Kurapika admitted, rolling over so that he faced away from Leorio. "I promise I'll make it up to you once it *is* over."

"Ah, a promise," Leorio mused happily. "I like the sound of that. But in the meantime..." He reached out and rested an arm around the blonde's waist. "All right?" he queried, wanting to make sure that amorous advances were welcome, since the Kuruta had been ill.

His lover didn't reply, but did snuggle further against him, so Leorio took it as a good sign. Fitting himself to Kurapika's back, Leorio kissed his neck, hand unhurriedly worming its way into the Kuruta's pants.

The sigh Kurapika gave was very tired and soft; Leorio might not have heard it had he not been spooning the blonde and mouthing the shell of his ear.

"Are you okay?" Leorio murmured, slowing his hand a fraction. "Should I stop?"

"No, no," Kurapika assured him quietly. He arched a little, pushing his hips forward and his head back. "Please go on."

So Leorio kept on, until Kurapika was moving lazily but in time with the strokes. Leorio rocked his own hips, rolling them against Kurapika's bottom. When Kurapika reached back, rubbing a hand over his thigh, Leorio decided that their goodbye was going to be more personal than just a hand-job.

"Hang on," Leorio said, and moved, smiling at Kurapika's half-hearted whimper. He put a hand on the Kuruta's shoulder and guided him to lie on his back. "Better," he pronounced, sliding Kurapika's pants off his hips without pretense.

"Someone might--!" The rest of Kurapika's sentence was interrupted by a moan.

Leorio would have liked to declare that he didn't care if anyone came in, but his mouth was happily occupied. He'd wanted to do this ever since Kurapika had done it to him, wanted to show his lover what it felt like.

At some point, Kurapika's hands found their way into his hair, unable to find purchase from the too-short strands. His hips were moving again, faster, trying to keep up with Leorio's mouth as he bobbed up and down.

Eventually, the blonde's hands untangled from Leorio's hair. Leorio heard them clap over his mouth to stifle the cry, and then Kurapika came, and Leorio choked a little, almost spitting the semen out. Some of it dribbled down his chin, but thankfully he didn't lose all of it. He couldn't say he cared for the taste, but swallowed anyway, even wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and licking it clean before climbing back up the mattress.

"How was that for a send-off?" he asked, dropping a kiss on Kurapika's forehead and smiling at his lover's sated expression.

"Mm," was all Kurapika managed, but he smiled back. And then he was wiggling down the futon, upsetting the blanket even more than they already had. The purpose of the action was just dawning on Leorio when Kurapika pushed at his hips and ordered, "Move."

Leorio did as he was asked, flopping down onto his back and eagerly helping the Kuruta to yank his slacks and boxers out of the way. Then Kurapika went down on him, and even though it was only the second time he'd performed oral sex, Leorio decided that Kurapika was and would always be much, *much* better at it.

When he came, he'd already turned his head to chew on a mouthful of pillow, so the cry was sufficiently muffled. As he basked in the aftermath of his orgasm, he felt Kurapika returning him to a state of decency. Once Kurapika was at his side once more, Leorio drew him closer so they could enjoy the afterglow together.

"There'll always be time," the blonde whispered. "I mean, for you and I. As far as I'm concerned."

"I know." Leorio raked his fingers through Kurapika's hair. "And I'm sorry for being so... undecided about the whole thing."

"No, it's okay. You've every right." Kurapika hesitated, and then added, "There's only been an 'us' for a few days, and already I feel like I'm taking advantage of your willingness to wait."

"Don't," Leorio commanded. "I meant what I said at that café, and if you *are* taking advantage, well, so am I." He squeezed Kurapika to stall any further protest, and said, "You did promise you'd make it up to me."

"With the moon as my witness," Kurapika assured him.

Leorio snickered. "Yes, well, the moon can't talk, so you're screwed."

"Is that *your* promise?" Kurapika mused, and then paused. "I said that out loud, didn't I?"

Still grinning, Leorio replied, "Yes, it *is* my promise."

 

 

+end+

 


End file.
